Girls 101 with Professor Hisagi
by bleachfan78
Summary: Kira is tired of girls always seeing him as a "friend". Hisagi decides to teach him how to please women. Let's just say he has some interesting teaching methods. Hisagi/Kira YAOI
1. Kira

I do not own Bleach. If I did it would have a much more adult rating. Reviews are appreciated!!!

This can take place more or less anytime the characters are in Soul Society. It's written from Kira's perspective.

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What kind of girl goes out with you, and isn't interested in anything you have to say? Oh, the shame of it all. When the others find out about this, I'll be laughed out of the Gotei 13.

My life is a shambles. My parents died when I was young, so goodbye helpful advice on that front. My friends at the academy seemed to be naturally skilled with girls, asking them for advice would have been mortifying. I had hoped to work up the courage to ask my Captain for advice, but then he went and betrayed everyone. So that's why I'm back in my room, ALONE, again.

Slumping down onto my futon; I see the latest issue of Seretei Communication lying on the floor. I had tossed it there earlier after seeing Captain Kurotsuchi on the cover; honestly why would anyone want to read about his mad experiments. And then I saw it, the magic words emblazoned across his picture, "A Scientific Guide to Understanding Females."

"This is exactly what I need." I was saved.

"What is?" came my sempai's disembodied voice from the door. "I thought you were going out tonight, what happened?"

"Things didn't go all that well. It turns out she was only interested in whether I could set her up with Renji." My hands are shaking as I try to hide the magazine – proof of how far I've fallen – behind my back.

"That sucks, so what did you say?" He's sitting next to me now, his hand mere inches from the magazine. Thoughts are flying through my mind each making less sense than the last. That's when I realize my lips are moving. Good God I'm talking, what about, what am I saying, why can't I stop?

"… Renji's seeing someone, it's probably not true but he's definitely hiding something. He says he's working late, but that doesn't seem like him. And now I feel bad that I lied to her, but they see me as a friend, I'm the guy they come to when they need someone safe. That's why I'm a hundred years old and still a virgin."

Did I really just say that out loud, kill me now. "Uhhh…" I can feel a blush rising, it's a good thing this hairstyle covers half of my face.

"Relax, Kira; you just need a few pointers. Just not from this." He picks up the magazine "It's nothing more than an anatomy lesson." and tosses it across the room. "What you need is Girls 101 with Professor Shuuhei Hisagi."

As expected, he's mocking me. My head turns toward him; I try not to look hurt, but just can't seem to smile. "If you're going to be a jerk about this, get out."

He laughs, "I'm serious. Think about it. You weren't born knowing how to fight were you? Well, the same applies to women. Someone's got to show you the ropes."

I'm not sure what to think now, but he could have a point. "Okay. But if anyone finds out about this, I'll kill you and say it was a Hollow."

"Deal." There was a strange glint in his eyes as he stood up and closed the door. "Okay, lesson one: How to know if she's interested." He sat down next to me again and rested his arm across my shoulders. Although he'd been doing the same thing since the Academy, something felt different this time, there was a tiny bit if pressure coming from his fingertips, as though he wanted to pull me towards him.

"Now, if a girl is interested, she'll lean into you."

"Like this?" My body seemed to be acting of its own accord, shifting to the side until my head was resting comfortably against Hisagi's shoulder. His skin felt cool, it had never occurred to me how much difference a sleeve could make.

"Yeah, now it's safe to kiss her." He used his free hand to lift my chin and gently placed his lips against mine. After a few seconds they started to move; I had to admit it was an interesting sensation, different than anything I had experienced in the past.

His hand slid down from my shoulder to my back as he turned his body toward mine. I could feel his chest pressed against me and then his tongue sliding against my lips. My own mouth opened at his request and the sensation of him probing and exploring my mouth was amazing. A low sound echoed at the back of my throat, I don't really know what it was supposed to be. All I know is that I just wanted him to keep kissing me.

Hisagi drew my lower lip into his mouth and then pulled away. "That kind of sound is exactly what you're looking for. Now you can move on to other things." He pushed me back onto the futon and positioned himself over me. I couldn't see his hands, but I knew they were untying my sash. He leaned in and kissed me again and I felt hands running over my chest as he opened my shirt.

"If she doesn't ask you to stop, feel free to explore more of her body. Remember to use your mouth so your hands are free." I was about to ask free for what, when I felt his lips travel down my collarbone, his lips sucking at my skin followed by teeth grazing my nipple; my back arched. Hisagi seemed to take that as a good sign, his fingers started to run down my abdomen and into my hakama.

The moment he touched me, the feel of his calloused fingers sliding back and forth over my shaft, my eyes closed and my reiatsu surged. Hisagi pulled himself off of me and I panicked. Had I offended him in some way? When I finally got up the courage to open my eyes, I realized he wasn't leaving; he was stripping off his own robes, revealing the sort of muscle definition I could only hope for. The black lines of his choker and arm bands an incredible contrast to his skin. I should have opened my eyes sooner.

I barely had time to admire the view when he pulled off my hakama, exposing my rather painfully aroused state. Never in all these years had the thought of being with another man even entered my mind, but now watching him kneel in front of me I had no intention of stopping. Even the overly cautious part of my mind couldn't come up with an argument.

""Hisagi, umm we…you…don't have to...uhhh" I couldn't get the words out clearly. Yet somehow Hisagi seemed to understand what I was trying to say. "I offered this class, remember? You don't need to worry about me." The way he smiled was all the reassurance I needed. Smiling back, I nodded and Hisagi settled himself between my legs.

As much as I wanted to look down and watch, I couldn't. The heat from Hisagi's mouth as he sucked, his tongue caressing me was beyond anything I had ever experienced before. Then his fingers started trailing downwards and suddenly I could feel them inside me. It was uncomfortable but not painful, until they started to move. My breath caught in my throat and I bit down on my lip. All of a sudden his fingers moved and there was this incredible feeling, like an electric shock. My back arched and I could feel my body shudder as I prayed he wouldn't stop. When he pulled away with one last flick of his tongue, I instinctively wanted to pull him back down.

"Now this is probably the last chance a girl's going to get to stop before you get serious." He was licking his lips as he sat up and at that moment I couldn't have cared less what he was saying. Apparently though, I was meant to say something, because he just raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Heh, I'm guessing you don't want me to stop, do you?"

This time the words got through, I turned my head slightly so my hair would provide some cover for the embarrassment I felt at not having heard him. "No, don't stop."

"Kira, there's no reason to be uncomfortable, just relax. But you will have to let me know if I'm hurting you." I nodded my understanding and he smiled, "Relax."

Hisagi grasped my hips and I could feel him pressed against me, a moment later he was inside me. The pain was intense; I had been injured countless times before, but nothing like this. I honestly thought my body would rip apart at any minute. When the pain began to subside, I opened my eyes to see Hisagi looking down at me; he looked frozen, nervous for the first time tonight. I did my best to assure him that I would be alright. "I'll be fine…just need a second, that's all. "

He kept looking at my face, watching my reaction and when he thought I was comfortable, he pushed in again, this time with a little more force. I felt my body adjust to the pain, and then everything changed. My legs circled Hisagi's waist pulling him toward me. My hands wrapped around his back, running over the firm muscles underneath.

Soon, I started thrusting my hips and to my amazement that incredible feeling from earlier was back. "Ahh…Hisagi."

"Yeah…mmm, I know." Was all he managed to say. I knew this was the end for me now, and the look on his face showed he was almost there too.

A few final thrusts; somehow always hitting that spot, and I felt my body explode. I gripped at the sheets and the wall behind me as my whole body was overcome by what I was sure was the most intense orgasm anyone had ever felt. Hisagi seemed to finish at the same time, I could hear his scream and the mutterings that followed, but they seemed too far away to understand.

Once he'd relaxed, I felt him pull out and lie down next to me. I was far beyond the ability to use coherent words, but somehow he managed it. "Now…you know how…to please a woman…lesson complete."

"Idiot." Was what I tried to say but it came out more of a sigh. So I just rested my head against his shoulder and felt his arm wrap around me before I fell asleep.


	2. Hisagi

I do not own Bleach. If I did it would have a much more adult rating. Reviews are appreciated!!!

This can take place more or less anytime the characters are in Soul Society. This is the from Hisagi's perspective.

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I was bored. There was absolutely nothing fun to do tonight. Maybe I could find someone to drink with, but who? Matsumoto was out with the Shinigami Women's Society, Ikkaku was with Yumichika, Renji had pulled another vanishing act, and Kira was on a date. Oh well, maybe I should just wait for Kira, his dates were usually disasters, he would probably be home soon. He was just so naive sometimes. Treating every woman with overwhelming politeness no matter how much they walked all over him. It was no surprise that they took advantage of him.

I made my way to his rooms to wait; only the door was open. It was only eight thirty; he couldn't be home already, could he? That boy was going to have to grow a spine, this was beyond ridiculous. I heard someone rummaging around and it occurred to me that it may not be Kira in there after all. How dare someone break into a lieutenant's room? I was about to burst through the door and surprise the intruder when I heard his voice.

"This is exactly what I need." he sounded strained.

Was someone in there with him, had his date actually gone well? I slowly stepped up to the door and peeked inside. He was sitting on the futon, talking to a magazine. The poor kid was losing his mind, I had to save him.

"What is?" I asked; walking into the room, ignoring the fact that I hadn't actually been invited. "I thought you were going out tonight, what happened?"

I held back a laugh watching him panic. Did he really think I hadn't noticed the magazine he was trying to hide behind his back? "Things didn't go all that well. It turns out she was only interested in whether I could set her up with Renji." He had a lot to learn, it's obvious that suddenly shoving your arms behind your back is going to draw attention.

"That sucks, so what did you say?" Normally, I would have pounced at the opportunity to see what he was hiding, but he just looked so miserable. So instead I sat next to him and pretended I hadn't seen anything.

"I told her Renji's seeing someone, it's probably not true but he's definitely hiding something. He says he's working late, but that doesn't seem like him. And now I feel bad that I lied to her, but they see me as a friend, I'm the guy they come to when they need someone safe. That's why I'm a hundred years old and still a virgin."

Mortified would be too subtle a word to describe the look on his face. I'm pretty sure he didn't actually mean to say that last part out loud. I decided not to make things worse and keep my mouth shut for once.

"Uhhh…" his face was beet red, half hidden behind that ridiculous hairstyle. I have to say something before he has a stroke. Then I see the magazine, it's the new issue of Seretei Communication. I really hated putting that psychopath Kurotsuchi on the cover, but we had nothing else. That's when I remember what the article is about and suddenly I have a plan.

"Relax, Kira; you just need a few pointers. Just not from this." I throw the stupid thing at the wall to emphasize my point. "What you need is Girls 101 with Professor Shuuhei Hisagi."

"If you're going to be a jerk about this, get out." He turns to look at me, and he's really doing his best to look normal, it just isn't working. I can't take it anymore; this is all just too funny. I start laughing and immediately feel bad about it.

It takes all my energy to keep a straight face as he glares at me. "I'm serious. Think about it. You weren't born knowing how to fight were you? Well, the same applies to women. Someone's got to show you the ropes."

I swear I can see the exact moment he decides this may be a good idea. "Okay. But if anyone finds out about this, I'll kill you and say it was a Hollow."

"Deal." There really was nothing else to say, so I settled for closing the door. I have no intention of being interrupted. And here I thought there wouldn't be anything fun to do tonight. "Okay, lesson one: How to know if she's interested." I crossed the room and sat down again, slowly draping my arm across his shoulders; fully aware that if things didn't work out exactly as planned, Kira might just kill me after all.

Oh well, here goes nothing. "Now, if a girl is interested, she'll lean into you."

"Like this?" Unbelievable, this is actually working? I should have tried this sooner.

Maybe this will work out. "Yeah, now it's safe to kiss her."

I decided to press my luck, after all Wabiske was on the other side of the room. If things went badly, I'd have a few seconds to defend myself. There was just something so adorable about the way he looked at me when I lifted his face toward mine. God, I hadn't expected his skin to be so soft.

Believe me when I say that feeling Kira's body shift and his lips part for me was a surprise. A part of me expected him to punch me. His lips tasted faintly of sake and something sweet. I had planned to explore his mouth a while longer, just in case. But that little moan of his was my cue to move on.

"That kind of sound is exactly what you're looking for. Now you can move on to other things." I softly pulled his lip into my mouth and then started to pull myself away when I felt his hand press at my back, trying to keep me from moving. Truthfully, I don't even think he was aware of it. I wasn't sure what I'd done to deserve this; but damn I was a lucky man.

I pressed my body against his pushing him back onto the futon and settled over him so that we'd be more comfortable. I wanted to make sure Kira was relaxed so I kissed him as my fingers worked at untying his sash. At least this was something I didn't need my eyes for; after all male or female, all Shinigami wore the same uniform.

His chest was smooth and firm, not nearly as soft as I'd expected. I wouldn't be able to keep this up for long, I needed more. "If she doesn't ask you to stop, feel free to explore more of her body. Remember to use your mouth so your hands are free."

I let my mouth slide down along his throat and chest pulling his nipple into my mouth as my hand started to wander further. Feeling his back arch under me was all the encouragement I needed. My hand slid into his hakama and I realized he was just as aroused as I was. I wrapped my fingers around him and started to slowly stroke him. His reaction was unexpected though; a swell of reiatsu surrounded us almost instantaneously. I could feel the desire coming off of his body in waves.

It was too much, I just couldn't wait anymore. Somehow, I managed to pull myself away and began to undress. His eyes were closed and I began to feel something different in his reiatsu, confusion or disappointment maybe? I was about to ask him if maybe he wanted me to leave when he opened his eyes. The strange emotion disappeared as though it had never been there to begin with.

The look in his eyes as he watched me undress was a little unnerving. This was a side of Kira I had never seen before. A part of me briefly wondered if this was the same intensity he showed in battle. It was consuming me; I knew I had to look away, so I focused on removing his hakama. The sight of Kira lying there, fully aroused took my breath away. I started to get down on my knees in front of him, when he spoke.

"Hisagi, umm we…you…don't have to...uhhh" He was blushing and it was unbelievably sweet. For a moment, he looked so lost that I couldn't help but smile.

"I offered this class, remember? You don't need to worry about me." When he nodded, I settled myself between his legs and lowered my head to taste him. I slowly ran my tongue over him before pulling him fully into my mouth. The quiet sounds he made were maddening, why did he always have to be so restrained?

He seemed to be enjoying the way I sucked and stroked him with my tongue; so I let my hand wander to his virgin opening, carefully sliding two fingers in. His breath caught when I started to move, and I was about to pull them away worried that I had hurt him when he arched his back and his entire body trembled. I knew I had managed to hit that magical spot.

This was the moment I had been waiting for. I pulled my mouth away from him and sat up. "Now this is probably the last chance a girl's going to get to stop before you get serious." I waited, wondering if he might have second thoughts about this. He didn't even seem to realize I was talking to him though, so I held back a laugh and tried again. "Heh, I'm guessing you don't want me to stop, do you?" it came out a lot more smugly that I'd planned.

"No, don't stop." It was clear from the way he turned away that I had embarrassed him. A pang of guilt ran through me, I hadn't had any intention of making him feel bad. After all he was probably the most self-conscious person I had ever met and I wanted to inspire confidence not destroy what little he had.

"Kira, there's no reason to be uncomfortable, just relax. But you will have to let me know if I'm hurting you." I waited for him to respond and smiled when he nodded. "Relax." I smiled again to encourage him but felt as though he was the one reassuring me when he smiled back.

Taking hold of his hips, I positioned myself against him, waiting a moment before slowly sliding in. I had expected that he would be in some pain, but the way he was squeezing his eyes closed and the scrunching his lips trying not to make a sound scared me. Had I really hurt him that badly? I froze, unsure of what to do. Would it hurt him more if I pulled out?

When he opened his eyes the fear must have been clear on my face because Kira stared at me slightly confused for a moment before speaking. "I'll be fine…just need a second, that's all." Here he was comforting me again.

I relaxed, and gave him time to adjust. I waited until he seemed comfortable before I began to move, increasing the pressure a little with each thrust. I was surprised when I felt his legs begin to wrap themselves around my waist. It seemed that he had finally given in to his instincts. I could feel his fingers running over my back and was glad that he was beginning to participate.

Kira shifted under me and the movement had me brushing against his prostate. "Ahh…Hisagi." He started to thrust his hips towards me and I knew he wouldn't be lasting much longer.

"Yeah…mmm, I know." I wanted to say something else, but couldn't. The pressure building up inside me was too strong and knew I'd be lucky if I lasted another minute or two.

A few final thrusts; and I was rewarded with the most incredible sight I had ever seen. Kira tilted his head back, grabbing at the sheets so hard his knuckles were white. Unlike him, I couldn't keep the noise from escaping my throat. Honestly, I don't even know what I said, just that whatever it was had been loud.

After a few moments, I pulled rolled off him and collapsed onto the futon. I just couldn't resist teasing him just a little bit though. "Now…you know how…to please a woman…lesson complete."

He muttered something under his breath that sounded a lot like "Idiot."

I really couldn't argue with that, so I just wrapped my arm around him before falling asleep.

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Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter: zoeynj, HitsugayaRangikuFTW, Gypsygrrl, ObsidianJade, and HarukaTenshiSushi

Also, thank you to everyone who added Girls 101 to their favorites and story alerts.


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